This Day…

I have been struggling with a subject for some time, whilst I was writing my last post I thought I had another one ready and structured in my mind… It turns I out I hadn’t. All I had was a bit of a confused thought and I couldn’t make my brain organise what it was I was thinking, but then today I realised what day it was.

I love pretty much everything about Valentines Day, because as I have mentioned, I am a big old soft romantic. I like that there is an air of anticipation around because everyone is kind of unsure what their significant other has planned. I like that it is generally the mans job to be spontaneous and that year after year men put themselves through torment and dagger-eyes by pretending they haven’t done anything only to surprise their girlfriend and wife. And even more than that, I like that year after year women fall for it.

The obvious argument, which I completely understand is that why should this one day be used to show how much you love someone? Surely you should show them all year round. Yes of course you should, and of course people do but usually the things you do to show someone how you feel become a part of who you are as a couple. That is in no way a bad thing, it’s the small things that make the big thing even more special. Definitely is it worth using a day that is celebrated as the day of love to extend those already small but romantic gestures into something bigger and celebrate your love for someone else.

I think that people who share the above opinion don’t look at the bigger picture. Like I said, you shouldn’t leave it to just one day of the year, absolutely not. But if you do, you are proving to whoever it is that you’re with that even though everyone else is doing it, you still want to prove to them just how amazing and special they are. I just don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. I mean, maybe if you are entirely cliché about it and decide to just send flowers to work or something that’s a little bit blasé, however, if you’ve never done that before how much would you’re loved one appreciate it? See what I mean, these things have been done for literally centuries but making someone feel more important than anyone else in the world is more important than whatever has been done in the past.

Obviously me being me has an issue with the whole commercialisation of Valentines Day, but as much as it makes me a hypocrite, I look at it all through rose tinted glasses. If none of the greeting card companies, supermarkets, wine shops, florists and restaurants latched on to this day then it would be far more difficult to make that someone special feel special wouldn’t it? Bragging as it may be, I am never short of ideas to do something unique but not everyone is as romantic and imaginative as I am so what would they do? Yes everything is a little over priced or maybe a lot over priced but everything can be done on a budget, I once did a whole Valentines romantic night with only fifty quid and none of seemed cheap or whatever and it was perfect.

The people out there who just “hate” Valentines Day have, in my experience either, never been treated to something special or unique or spontaneous or had a very bad experience one February 14th. I don’t think it is fair at all to tarnish a day that people (whether they like to admit it or not) love to celebrate because you have never had what you want. That is the epitome of selfishness to me and everything that is actually wrong with people in general but Valentines Day. Half of the people in the world (the part of the world that celebrates Valentines anyway) are in high spirits about the plan they have for their sweethearts and the other are miserable for the whole day being Valentine Scrooges and trying to ruin it for everyone else. That’s just not nice.

This year marks the first that I have not done something for Valentines day, as it is the first year (since my teens) that I am single. And no I’m not depressed about it. I’m not going to cry myself asleep because everyone else is all loved up and I’m all alone and blah blah blah… No that’s not me. I am happy to see everyone else being treated to something extraordinary and different to humdrum of day to day life. I am sitting on a sofa listening to love songs on the radio writing the blog and I have a smile on my face. Today makes me happy.

The love songs are one of the things I like about Valentines, because you usually get to hear someone say how much they love their better half to thousands of people. And that I think is the point. Like an epiphany that was then… Valentines Day is not just about showing your boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife, partner or lover that you love them, it’s about showing the rest of the world that that is the person you love. That that one person means more to you than anything or anyone else. How can making a gesture of love, that will make someone feel like one in a million, and put a smile on a persons face for the whole day… How can that be a bad thing?

Almost everyone in the world wants to find that one someone that they can spend the rest of their lives with. Almost everyone in the world is looking for love. This is a day that can be filled with heartache, there are probably thousands of people that have used this day to say what they feel only to be told those feelings are wasted. That hurts, it happened to me when I was a little boy, it was puppy love, but it hurt. Even if that is the case and you get rejected, at least you tried. At least you told that special someone that to you, they are perfect. If you have been rejected, don’t be depressed about it. Remember that even though it was probably awkward and was the exact opposite of what you wanted, you still made that person feel more important than they would have otherwise. And is that not what you wanted to do all along?

People forget that romance exists throughout the year and then seem to complain that it is silly or stupid when we all be romantic at the same time. Romance is something that very few people truly understand. The smallest of gestures are as romantic as the big extravagant ones. Running a hot bubble bath for someone who’s had a long day - candles or no. Making a cup of tea because you know that’s just what is needed. Being there at the right moment with your arms wide open to hold somebody who has been waiting to be held all day. A smile across a room because that smile is more perfect than all the works of art in the world. Doing something as normal as picking up a paper on the way home because they’d forgotten. All of those things are romantic. You just have to realise it. Every couple in every corner of the world have something that is unique and special, something that makes them a couple like holding hands if your on different sofas or touching each others face in a loving way. Those are the romantic things that everybody wants and Valentines Day is a glimpse into something that already exists.

There is nothing more important than telling the person that you love, that you love them. If you say it too much the words just become words, sometimes its better to say it without saying it. To me, there is nothing like that feeling you get when someone looks at you and tells you that they love you. For a moment the world just stops, and there is nothing, not a sound nor a soul, just that person standing there saying words that don’t really express the feeling they describe. The three most powerful words in the English language. Then you kiss, and that feeling is coming through your chest making you feel like you could explode because nothing makes you this happy. That there is nothing else that you could possibly want. That everything for is perfect. That you love and are loved.